How do I tell my child about my ADHD diagnosis without feeling ashamed?

Wendy’s Answer:

This is such a meaningful question, and you’re not alone in feeling this way. Many parents struggle with how much to share with their child about their own ADHD diagnosis, especially when shame or fear is involved. But your diagnosis isn’t something to hide—it can actually strengthen your relationship with your child.

When I was diagnosed with ADD as an adult, I felt that same hesitation. And when my son was later diagnosed with ADHD, that fear doubled—not because of him, but because I didn’t want him to see my struggles. What surprised me most was how much changed once I shared my story honestly. Instead of creating distance, it created connection.

Children don’t need perfect parents—they need honest ones. When you speak openly, your child doesn’t see you as “less than.” They see you as human. That honesty shows them it’s safe to talk about challenges and emotions, too.

Sharing your diagnosis can also help your child better understand themselves. If your child is neurodivergent, your experience becomes a roadmap that helps normalize their own. If they’re not, it builds empathy and understanding in a powerful way.

An ADHD diagnosis doesn’t define you or your child—it simply gives language to experiences you may have already been navigating. Talking about it doesn’t create fear; it creates trust. It shows courage, and children feel that bravery more than we realize.

For many neurodivergent families, these conversations become a foundation for deeper connection, self-acceptance, and healthier communication over time.

💙 Looking for calm, supportive guidance for neurodivergent women navigating overwhelm?
You can learn more about how I support women on my Neurodivergent Women page.

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